Answer:  One Resolution – 52 Chances to Make It Work – Me Time Monday℠ for Caregivers

Ahhh the New Year is here – the hectic pace of the holidays is over, the frenzy over buying gifts and seeing  friends and family is done (at least for another 12 months).  You can finally breathe.  That is, unless you are one of the 65 million Americans who are caring for a loved one – that moment to put the world on “pause” and get a break never seems to happen.

Why are resolutions – those promises we make to ourselves – the hardest to keep?   According to the University of Scranton researcher John Norcross and author of Changing for Good, one in four of us make a resolution for the New Year but after six months only 46 percent are still sticking with it.

According to research conducted by Richard Wiseman, a psychologist at the University of Hertfordshire in England, of those who fail to keep their resolution one common pitfall is focusing on the downside of the goal – suppressing your cravings, fantasizing about being successful, adopting a role model or relying on willpower alone.  He stated in an interview with The Guardian, “Failing to achieve your ambitions is often psychologically harmful because it can rob people of a sense of self control.”

When it comes to caring for an older parent, a chronically ill spouse or a child with special needs, we know that caregivers are at risk for adopting bad habits such as smoking or drinking, for not getting enough sleep, for not having the time to eat or exercise right and for not taking enough time to focus on themselves – whether it is a coffee date with a friend, a pedicure, a movie or other things that can bring a smile to our face.

This is why my wish for all caregivers this year is to make a promise to yourself that you can keep.  Make it simple.  Make it just about you.  Here are some tips on how to get there:

1. First of all, you need to have an actual plan.  If you just have a desire to improve something, it is not enough.   You will be more successful at achieving your goal if you have steps on how to get there.  For instance, it is not about losing weight – it is about the changes you will take to reach that goal.  Breaking a big goal into small increments is a key part of your plan.
2. In addition, you need to track your progress.  This instills a sense of mini accomplishments on the path to your goal.  This is why weight loss centers like Weight Watchers or Jenny Craig see high rates of success among their members because each week they have a sense of accomplishment.  And, it does help to talk to someone who is invested in seeing you be successful.  Having a friend or other support person who can be your “cheerleader” – celebrating your milestones towards the goal can help keep you going.
3. Lastly, be committed to your goal.   Keep it simple (one resolution is better than two or three) and treat occasional “slips” as temporary setbacks on the path to reaching your goal.  You have to commit to change.   This is a marathon not a sprint.  Be kind to yourself if you have a bad day that makes you reach for the chocolate.  Remember the words of Scarlett O’Hara, “Tomorrow is another day.”  Start fresh the next day after a lapse.

When I started Caregiving Club I had the luck of meeting with a non-profit organization that I thought had a brilliant idea.  It is called Healthy Monday – based on scientific research and the support of prestigious institutions such as Johns Hopkins University, Syracuse University and Columbia University, they have found that starting a new routine on a Monday will make you more successful at whatever you want to achieve.  Essentially the premise is simple – just as the New Year is a time when we resolve to do something, every Monday is an opportunity to renew that promise to ourselves.

Healthy Monday says their research shows that most Americans feel Monday is the day for a fresh start.  It is part of our cultural DNA – Monday is the start of the work week, the school week and we feel renewed energy to start something after a nice weekend respite.

For caregivers, I believe using the Monday point in time to remind you of “what have I done for me lately?” makes sense.  Whether it is 5 minutes or 5 hours – it does not matter.  Check in with yourself every Monday and take time for you.

I was thrilled when Healthy Monday created a specific Caregivers’ Monday campaign.  They are part of a national movement to get our society focused on the value of family caregivers and the need to help caregivers stay healthy themselves.  They have also been wonderful advocates for Caregiving Club’s Me Time Monday℠ video tips – a new tip each week to remind caregivers to take a moment for them.

Click here to learn more and see the videos

Fifty-two weeks to reach your goal.  Pick one thing that you would like to accomplish just for you this year.  Check in with yourself every Monday.

And, tell me what your “Me Time” tip is – I will include it in my future videos and blogs.  Good luck – 2012 is your year!